The ‘Soft Play Parent’ Personality Test
Soft play. A magical place where toddlers turn into stunt doubles and coffee becomes a survival tool. You might think you're just taking the kids out to burn off some steam, but in reality? You’re about to enter the wild, wonderful world of soft play parenting, and who you become inside that foam-padded kingdom says a lot about you.
Before we reveal your true soft play self, let’s have a little warm-up…
Welcome to Tenpin’s Jungle
If you haven’t been to one of Tenpin’s soft play zones, you’re missing out. They’re clean, colourful, padded to perfection, and actually fun. Whether you’re dodging foam balls or sipping a coffee while pretending to supervise, Tenpin’s soft play centres are the real MVPs for modern parenting.
And guess what? It’s not just for little ones. With bowling, arcades, table tennis, food, and even karaoke under the same roof, you might just want to move in.
Why a Soft Play Personality Test?
Because let’s be honest, we all handle soft play very differently. Some of us are clambering through tunnels like action heroes. Others are glued to the café seats with a flat white and a thousand-yard stare. And that’s fine. All of it. But what if your behaviour could be categorised? Celebrated? Lightly mocked?
Well, now it can.
The 8 Soft Play Parent Personality Types (Which One Are You?)
Let’s be honest, no one enters a soft play centre thinking, “Today, I shall become that parent.” But give it ten minutes and we all morph into one of these gloriously chaotic characters. From snack smugglers to part-time ninja chaperones, the soft play world has a role for everyone.
Don’t worry, there’s no judgement here, just foam pits, flying socks, and a gentle reminder that you’re definitely not as subtle as you think. Ready to find out where you fit in? Let’s roll (and maybe crawl through a tunnel or two).
The Snack Dealer
You’d think they were smuggling gold, the way they pull out snacks with the precision of a magician. One minute their kid’s melting down, the next they’ve whipped out a banana, oat bar, and fruit pouch like it’s a Michelin-star menu.
They’ve got snacks for their own kid, other people’s kids, and probably you if you ask nicely. Don’t be surprised if their bag crinkles louder than the soft play ball pit.
How to spot them:
- Always carrying an enormous bag that defies physics
- Knows every allergy-friendly treat on the market
- Makes eye contact only when offering raisins
The Helicopter Pilot
They're not on the edge of the action, they are the action. Shadowing their kid like a bodyguard, ducking under foam tunnels and crawling through nets with a level of intensity usually reserved for SAS training.
If you thought soft play was for children only, think again. They’re three slides deep and have the elbow burns to prove it.
Giveaway signs:
- Never more than 1.5 metres from their child
- Whispering, “Careful... gentle... no pushing...” like a mantra
- Slightly out of breath, even while standing still
The Scroll & Sip
Armed with a latte and a phone set to ‘Do Not Disturb’, this parent is living their best soft play life. They came for one reason: a moment’s peace.
You’ll find them nestled on a sofa, pretending not to see their child lobbing foam cubes across the room. Are they even your child if you're not ignoring them occasionally?
Spot them by:
- A death grip on their oat milk flat white
- Scrolling like it’s a sport
- Occasionally shouting “GOOD JOB!” without looking up
The Fitness Tracker
They didn’t plan to sweat, but their Apple Watch now thinks they’ve done a HIIT class.
Chasing a toddler through three levels of padded chaos has them clocking more steps than a marathon runner. They didn’t wear gym clothes, but they’ll leave feeling like they need a protein shake.
Look out for:
- Red cheeks and a bewildered expression
- “Is it hot in here or just me?” said 47 times
- A very real fear of the twisty slide
The Over-Apologiser
“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry, he doesn’t usually throw balls at faces.”
This parent is convinced their child is the sole reason chaos exists in the soft play. Even when other kids are tap dancing on tables, they’ll apologise for their toddler coughing near a foam step.
Easily spotted by:
- Constantly saying “sorry” on behalf of their child
- Handing out baby wipes like party favours
- Apologising to the coffee machine
The Social Butterfly
They’re not here just for the kids. Oh no. This is their weekly catch-up, gossip sesh, and therapy appointment all in one.
If you’re within a 5-metre radius, they’ll rope you into a full-blown conversation about school catchment areas, their dog’s rash, and the state of the council bins.
They tend to:
- Use the soft play as their office water cooler
- Know everyone’s name (and star sign)
- Forget their child exists until it’s time to leave
The Photographer
They’ve got a phone in one hand and their kid’s dignity in the other. If there's a photo opp, they're on it. Mid-slide? Snap. Post-bounce? Snap. Attempting to sneak a cheeky nose-pick? Snap.
Their camera roll is 98% soft play blur and 2% birthday cake.
Flashy traits:
- Uses “Wait, do it again!” as a parenting tool
- Crouched in weird positions for the perfect angle
- Constantly re-adjusting hairbands and t-shirts for “the shot”
The Escape Planner
They arrived five minutes ago and are already plotting the exit.
They’ve scanned the room, clocked the emergency exits, and worked out how long they can stay before someone cries or wees themselves. Not a fan of small talk, big noise, or being asked to hold someone else’s baby.
Dead giveaways:
- Glancing at the clock like they’re defusing a bomb
- Pretending not to hear “Can we stay longer?”
- Already has their coat halfway on
Bonus Round: Create Your Own Combo
Most of us aren’t just one type. You might be a Social Butterfly and a Helicopter Hero. Or an Instagrammer with strong Escape Artist tendencies. It’s a spectrum, and that’s what makes it fun.
So next time you’re at Tenpin, spot the personalities. Or better yet, embrace yours.
Ready for Action? Bring Your Personality to Tenpin
Whether you’re a clapper, creeper, or caffeine drinker, Tenpin’s soft play areas are made for all kinds of families. Book in, bring the chaos, and let your little ones burn off that never-ending energy while you enjoy the warm, judgment-free embrace of fellow soft play survivors.